Post by Fluermorte on Feb 15, 2014 22:47:55 GMT -5
I donno, but questions:
Why was such a prosperous area turned into a prison? That's like taking your best dairy cow and killing it to make glue from its bones. You said the woods were cursed but is that because criminals were thrown in there or because of something else? -And- that something is what caused the wall to go up, which could also serve as a prison which would grant income (making a bad situation a good one).
Oh...and how did you get new people into the forest without releasing the old ones? Please tell me there was some sort of crane system that literally dropped people behind the fence or better yet a low power catapult, that caused some fortunate criminals to get impaled on trees rather than suffer a life in the forest.
You said there were crops -and- game, so...just -how- big is this area? It must be a substantial tract of land to include farmland and forest, maybe even the ruins of a few small towns? That would be pretty cool. What locations are you thinking of for proxies for this forested area?
Oh, and as for the cultists, they were really underground when they weren't actively doing creepy stuff like summoning tentacle monsters around gold mines. But(!) that would be a good reason for them to have not been immediately executed, "mercy" in the light of insubstantial evidence.
As for actual suggestions: Loosen the reigns slightly. I know you're trying to convey a story in a limited amount of time, but the point of these things is character interaction and reaction. It's fun to have things happening but it isn't fun to -want- to react but being unable to because the next thing is already happening. Of course, I'm not saying wait for each person to post an emote, but some fair warning of a big thing happening might be nice...or giving time...or whatever. I get that Praxos is a character with power and momentum, so some ooc communication might bridge the gap between Praxos moving ahead and limitations of the medium in which we operate (lag, slow typers, etc..).
Slightly more divergence allowed in the story. What I mean by that is that I know this is 'your story' but a couple of events felt like we were just there to witness your character doing something and our actions didn't really amount to much. Ah...maybe more /rolls? Don't write out a rigid plot in your head and stick to it as gospel, rather create a loose frame that can accommodate the character's different opinions; be a game master rather than a narrator. A caveat to that is considering the wildly differing skill sets of the people who might come, for example Ruth could scan a room for latent magical energies left by a spell, while Sparrow could bring back the soul of the victim to act as witness to the crime committed, Fluer is a metalsmith she could offer a lot of insight into a weapon left behind; that being said you should be able to provide players with the information that their characters would know based on their skills. Additionally, some characters are just plain better suited to investigating; they're more observant and/or paranoid than others; so a bonus to rolls might be in order, or whispered additional information, example: Ruth is pretty cocky and absentminded because chances are that she'd rather be back with her Sha, but Sparrow is suspicious of damn near anything, then there's Kilter who would probably be too interested in flirting to notice something.
So...that's my two cents for now...I guess I'll add more if I think of anything else. I'd also like to offer my services as a practice run. We can talk about that more in person the next time we're both online.
Why was such a prosperous area turned into a prison? That's like taking your best dairy cow and killing it to make glue from its bones. You said the woods were cursed but is that because criminals were thrown in there or because of something else? -And- that something is what caused the wall to go up, which could also serve as a prison which would grant income (making a bad situation a good one).
Oh...and how did you get new people into the forest without releasing the old ones? Please tell me there was some sort of crane system that literally dropped people behind the fence or better yet a low power catapult, that caused some fortunate criminals to get impaled on trees rather than suffer a life in the forest.
You said there were crops -and- game, so...just -how- big is this area? It must be a substantial tract of land to include farmland and forest, maybe even the ruins of a few small towns? That would be pretty cool. What locations are you thinking of for proxies for this forested area?
Oh, and as for the cultists, they were really underground when they weren't actively doing creepy stuff like summoning tentacle monsters around gold mines. But(!) that would be a good reason for them to have not been immediately executed, "mercy" in the light of insubstantial evidence.
As for actual suggestions: Loosen the reigns slightly. I know you're trying to convey a story in a limited amount of time, but the point of these things is character interaction and reaction. It's fun to have things happening but it isn't fun to -want- to react but being unable to because the next thing is already happening. Of course, I'm not saying wait for each person to post an emote, but some fair warning of a big thing happening might be nice...or giving time...or whatever. I get that Praxos is a character with power and momentum, so some ooc communication might bridge the gap between Praxos moving ahead and limitations of the medium in which we operate (lag, slow typers, etc..).
Slightly more divergence allowed in the story. What I mean by that is that I know this is 'your story' but a couple of events felt like we were just there to witness your character doing something and our actions didn't really amount to much. Ah...maybe more /rolls? Don't write out a rigid plot in your head and stick to it as gospel, rather create a loose frame that can accommodate the character's different opinions; be a game master rather than a narrator. A caveat to that is considering the wildly differing skill sets of the people who might come, for example Ruth could scan a room for latent magical energies left by a spell, while Sparrow could bring back the soul of the victim to act as witness to the crime committed, Fluer is a metalsmith she could offer a lot of insight into a weapon left behind; that being said you should be able to provide players with the information that their characters would know based on their skills. Additionally, some characters are just plain better suited to investigating; they're more observant and/or paranoid than others; so a bonus to rolls might be in order, or whispered additional information, example: Ruth is pretty cocky and absentminded because chances are that she'd rather be back with her Sha, but Sparrow is suspicious of damn near anything, then there's Kilter who would probably be too interested in flirting to notice something.
So...that's my two cents for now...I guess I'll add more if I think of anything else. I'd also like to offer my services as a practice run. We can talk about that more in person the next time we're both online.
